


Innocent

by Tikxy



Series: Late Night Murmurings [1]
Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: M/M, One Shot, late night murmurings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2018-08-09 23:47:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7821925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tikxy/pseuds/Tikxy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Link breaks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Innocent

Yeah, I killed him. I’m not going to apologize for it either.

The sweat is stinging my eyes and I may have re-injured my shoulder trying to dig a hole in hard California soil for the body.

I swipe my forearm across my forehead to rid myself of the salty moisture and a streak of dirt is left in its stead.

All I want to do is call Rhett. Tell him what I did. What I had to do.

I twitch.

I swear I heard the bushes rattle. The wind maybe. A squirrel.

Jesus, killing him had been easy but burying him is taking too much time. Way too much time. I need to get back to the office before Rhett wonders where I’ve gone.

What was that?!

Nothing.

Nothing.

_Dig, Neal!_ Rhett’s voice screams in my head. I grit my teeth and start digging again. It has to be deeper for the body.

Maybe I should have driven out to the desert and left the body there to rot and decay instead of stopping here to fight for a pit little deeper than a stack of IHOP pancakes.

_Dig!_

Shut up!

Jesus!

Always taunting me.

_Be a man and do! Just do it and get it done, Neal!_

“I’m doing it!”

My voice startles me. I drop the shovel in shock and it knocks the loose shoe from the foot of the body.

“Fuck!”

I run my hands through my hair and look up at the sky. It’s so blue. So freaking blue. An amazing, you shouldn’t kill a guy on this kind of day, blue.

“I had to!”

_Why’re you talking to yourself, Neal?_

_Pick up the shovel and dig!!_

I start digging again and my shoulder starts screaming at me too. I don’t need this shit.

_Are you crying, Neal?_

“Shut up!”

_You’re weak, man._

“I’m not!”

Fuck. I _am_ crying. Hands shaking so much I can’t even scoop a spoonful of sugar if that’s what I was trying to dig a pit in. But I’m trying to dig a hole in California and that ain’t easy either.

Snot. Saliva. I use a napkin in my back pocket to deal with it and I litter for the first time in years.

If I’m going to put a whole human in a hole, why not a napkin too? It’ll disappear at some point. Just like the fucking body.

_But the bones…_

Can’t shut up. Always talking. Always knowing everything. I need to get back.

_The bones…_

The shovel is lying on the ground and mocking me too. Nothing but a long piece of wood and some metal and it still manages to get under my skin. Just one more thing I can’t do right. Can’t even get the body in the ground cause I can’t even get _into_ the ground.

And it’s so fucking hot!

I pull out my phone and throw it at the sun but it doesn’t do anything. At least it makes a satisfying crunch when it hits the ground. But it reminds me of another crunch and soon I’m on the ground too, holding my stomach and heaving for all I’m worth.

It’d been so easy.

Nothing comes up.

So easy.

He went down like a baby to its nap - a little bit of noise, then after a while, silence.

I’m not going to apologize for that.

It hurt me more than it hurt you.

My eyes bounce over the body then back to the parched and thirsty ground beneath it.

_Giving up, Neal?_

And so what if I am. The ground is rock. The shovel is slippery in my palms. My shoulder learned how to make fire and now doesn’t like to live without it. Twisted son of a bitch.

The sun was so warm. No hot. It was hot. Still as hot as it was before. Warm. Jesus why am I trembling then?

My wedding band glints like the fucking eye of Sauron and I know it’s laughing at me too.

A crime of passion. The whole thing had been a crime of passion but I know I won’t get less time for that.

Should’ve just stayed there and confessed but I’m out here on my knees next to a body I don’t have the strength to lift anymore.

Passion.

Fuck. What had we even been fighting about?

That’s how it was with us.

We’d fight without fighting, just shouting at each other for fun until the other became serious. This time it was me.

I don’t even know what point I was trying to make. I don’t even…

I try to say this to the body but I know it won’t understand me. It can’t fight back. It’s just an _it_. It’s not… _him._ Not anymore.

He’d been in there only a few moments ago. Wild-eyed and excited about something.

Now he wasn’t and-

“I need to get back,” I whisper to my phone as if it will understand me and tell him I’m on my way.

I’m crap at siri. She doesn’t get me. He got me…most of the time. Then I got him.

_Crunch._

I feel my stomach lurch again and I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to un-hear it.

_You’re being stupid, Neal._

I know that. I know I am. But I can’t dig. I can’t…I - I need to get back…


End file.
